RAYMOND's: February 2014

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Today's JOKES...Crack a laugh...

No1

A man was so jealous of his newly born baby that he put poison on the wife's nipples while she was asleep.

The next day, their driver died of poisoning.

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No2

A man is dying of cancer, but keeps telling people he is dying of AIDS.

His son asked Dad why?

He answered, so that when I am dead, no one will sleep with your mum.

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No3

A lady lost three panties in her house and blamed her maid in front of the husband.

Maid said sir you are my witness you know I never wear panties.

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No4

Couple is having a quickie and their 6 year old catches them,

Son: "What are you doing?" Ask the son.

Father: "I’m putting petrol on your Mom."

Son: "Haauu - Haauu! Which means Mom’s engine is taking too much petrol cause Mr Zwane has put in yesterday."

Mother fainted!

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No5

A man went to the pub with his wife.

When he left for the counter to buy drinks a prostitute approached his wife & whispered:

"You must DEMAND cash before sex, I know him he doesn't pay.

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No6 - Classic

An 8 year old boy is accused of rape*.

In court his lady lawyer holds his dick out as evidence saying, "Your honour see this, can he rape* with this tiny tot?

The boy whispers, "Don't shake it, we'll lose the case!"